As a licensed clinical psychologist, who has been talking to clients about the pandemic and it’s effects over the last 4 weeks, here is what I have learned…

No one is doing well, and that’s ok.
I’m not saying that everyone is feeling terrible all of the time, but I’m saying most people aren’t feeling wonderful all of the time either. Some people are struggling to find work and pay bills, while others are struggling with how to support the required technology use that comes with working from home and online school. But the one thing we are all struggling with is the uncertainty of the future and our sense of safety and security having been threatened by a virus that we cannot control. We are clearly told it is not safe to leave our house, so of course we feel scared, anxious, and worried. And if your house isn’t safe, due to toxic or abusive relationships, or other lack of safely and resources, then we feel panicked, detached, or hopeless.
It’s easy to be hard on ourselves and feel like we “should” be doing more. I am here to tell you, now is not the time to be drowning under the “should's and ought’s.” Now is the time for self acceptance, self compassion, and connection. Spend time connecting to your self, you friends, and your family. Spend time connecting to nature. Spend time connecting to your breath. Seek out authentic connections with others and practice being in the moment. Judgment and blame, towards oneself or others, needs to be ushered out the door….now.
It feels like we are on a roller coaster with confusing and fluctuating feelings and experiences. I’m happy to be spending time with my kids, but I feel bad when I need to spend time on work. I’m happy that we are able to work from home and social distance, but I’m sad and angry that there are people who have to go to unsafe work situations, or leave their kids at home, or are stressed that they can’t cover all of their expenses. I’m grateful that there is more family time, but miss seeing extended family. I’m worried about work, the kids education, the increasing number of deaths, finding a cure, human pain and suffering, the effect of this trauma, the effect of past trauma, and the list goes on. I have learned to make space for these feelings. They are perhaps the only normal thing during these times. I have found that when I give them space, the loosen their grip, even if only a bit.
We are not breathing enough. Breathing is essential. Breathing is key. Breathe and find other ways to ground yourself in moment, to connect to the earth, to your body, to your heart. Just breathe.